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Being a father is easy!

January 2, 2010

Ok, so this isn’t really a cLARAfication, it’s actually an OBAMAfication, because according to our esteemed leader, being a great father doesn’t have to be hard!

I found this out while watching Glee on Hulu, because the Department of Health saw this platform as a perfect advertising space to reach out to current or future fathers, especially those who turn to a kitschy teen dramedy for parenting advice.  And what advice does President Obama have to give?

To be a great dad is the most important job in a man’s life

Gee, Obama, thanks for invalidating the accomplishments of any man who doesn’t have children.  (Wow, you cured cancer!  Oh, but you never knocked a bitch up?  Fail.)

but it doesn’t have to be hard.

I’m not a father, nor will I ever be, but I’m pretty sure fatherhood isn’t exactly a cake walk.  Show that ad to any great dad and he’ll be ready to break out the battle wounds.  Show the ad to a terrible dad, of either the corporate or deadbeat variety, and they will be even less inclined to blindly believe in the facility of fatherhood.

So who might believe this?  Teenage baby daddies who tend to resemble, perhaps, characters on Glee?  Perfect.  They can convince their girlfriends not to responsibly give the child to one of the thousands of loving families waiting on adoption lists, because they’re convinced “it doesn’t have to be hard.”

And what’s more? All it takes is a few minutes of your time.

I think what he meant to say is that it only takes a few minutes of your time to become a father, not actually be one.  And popping in for those “few moments that count the most”? Doesn’t exactly work that way–fatherhood isn’t a college class where you can miss every lecture and then cram to ace the final.

Now don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the sentiment behind the message, and I agree that parents should spend more time with their children, but who decided to frame it that way?  This kind of message seems more appropriate for combating climate change, showing people that they can do small things to help with the big picture.  But with a kid, being a father is the big picture.  You can’t just throw your time at a kid like loose change into an empty water container.  There is no CoinStar machine that will spit out a well-balanced child, at least that I’m aware of, but maybe Obama has people secretly working on that as part of the health care package.

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